"Leave good taste to pizza and bring on the fanservice!"




THINGS TO KNOW

Eiken fanboys- Good news is, now the licenses for books 7-12 have been obtained! We'll get them for sure now, which is of course a good thing! We're even up to 9 in stores as we speak. The bad news is that STILL doesn't automatically mean we'll see issues 13-18. Prove we want them too!
Start from the top and work your way down.


Assuming you're American, get out there and learn about your political candidates. VOTE, and prove that we, the younger set, are a political group worth listening to.




THE LATEST UPDATE


April 10, 2008

I do believe my favorite birthday present (yes, that being April 9) was getting to imagine the horrified looks my entire user base gave me. Yes, my readers, Iím very sorry for having done so, but I done April Fooled you a few days late. Now, I could have been like the rest of the world and actually did it on April 1st, but COME ON, itís more fun when NOBODY sees the joke coming, heehee. Did the fact that I did it after a ten-month hiatus scare you all the more? By the way, sorry about that hiatus. That was actually more due to a combination of ennui and soul-crushing depression due to college and work.

But really, you should have known better. Everybody knows I think the female influence on the anime market has been an almost universally bad thing (you KNOW theyíre getting too much power when yaoi now makes up over half of the storesí hentai sections). Well, except for the whole bit about the increased cosplayer count. After all, some of them are pretty good at it, donítchaknow. So I like THAT. Still, bottom line is that I am a male (more or less), first and foremost. The ladies can get their own sites if they want to avoid the rampant chauvinism. Also, I think it to be a bit of a giveaway that I hadnít actually deleted a darn thing on my site, should you have kept track of my gallery URLs and had a gander.

That being said, I put enough effort into the Khi thing to where Iím not going to delete it, as my site needs more padding than the brassiere of Kyoko Morooka. I shall give the zero female readers of my site THAT much of an inch. If nothing else, it may be a nerfarious plot to extend the life of the DearS anime, which I personally really like. Really, contrary to the belief it looks like I put out, my enjoyment of DearS isn't just because Mitsukaís in it. Hell, since my mood's gonna be improving soon, you may see me go after some of the other characters from that show. Although I'd sooner shove a nail bat up my own urethra than give that asshole Hiro-kun so much as a glance.

This all being said, yes- THIS is the real update. Iíve actually already done most of the legwork with the other additions, so all thatís new NOW is a gallery for something Iíll freely admit MY ass never saw coming. Dear readers, who in the hell would ever expect a character from what we know as ďZatch BellĒ to EVER come within 200 furlongs of this site? ErÖ thatísÖ pretty far away, isnít it? Well, I didnít, but one did, albeit with a rather creepy grin. Her name is, I kid you not, Big Boing. Her power is, well, having big boing. Donít call her Boing-chan.
In addition, if you're a fan of TygerStar's animated gif files, there's a few more he sent me. Check around in Mouse and Jungle de Ikou.

In case you care, I didnít splice everything together like I should have yet, but both Puni Puni Poemy and Women at Work will be seeing galleries during the next update. See, I have actually already jammed through both shows and got all the pictures, so all thatís left are thumbnails and rude jokes.

Everything not related to my cruel joke that has been updated is still listed below, if you missed it before.

Other content updates include...

-A whole new section! Now instead of asking Rei, you can ask ME things! So I didn't have any questions this time around, see if that stops me.
-I added a game review; "Berzerk". Thumbnail Theater rises again.
-Instead of there being a bunch of links to where you can buy individual animes, I'm just gonna put in a few links to sites where you can buy many different animes. It's less confusing for you and I get to do a lot less work, so everyone wins.

LATER content updates include...

I feel DIRTY for ever having claimed Eiken sucks, YES, that was a damn LIE. But nonetheless, I will still be doing that plot guide for it, and yes, it will be about as scary as it sounds. The scariest part yet? It's longer than a paragraph. Seriously, this thing is taking a LOT longer than I could ever have imagined; I don't know if that's good or bad.



Quotes of the update:

"C'mon, don't just... Ninja kick the damn rabbit! Do something!"
-"Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles", the first movie

"Thank you so much, young man. I'm sorry I don't have any hard candy for you."
-Susan Walsh to Frank West, "Dead Rising"

"Looks like we've run into our first problem, a dragon wall!"
-Chet, "Awesome Video Games", ep. 11- Double Dragon, Mode B



PAST UPDATES



GALLERY COLOR LEGEND
Description has blue BG Gallery is ripped from computer files. Quality is typically lower.
Description has red BG Gallery is ripped from DVDs I own. Quality is typically higher.
Description has green BG Gallery is either mostly fanart, or provided by other people.
Character/Anime has pink BG Character has been new to the site since my lazy ass last updated.
Character/Anime has... ugh, I dunno, bastardized bronze BG? Character has had new content added since my last update.
Character/Anime has black BG Nothing new to report for the gallery since the last update.


GALLERIES
CHARACTER or ANIME
PHOTO
DESCRIPTION
Yuka Takeuchi
Anime: Variable Geo
Any doubt SHE'D appear? Come on already. Yuka Takeuchi, combat waitress extraordinaire (stop laughing) and star of quite a number of video games from back in the day until... whenever the game before V.G. Rebirth came about. Also: an anime. Remember folks, if it ain't Takahiro Kimura's character art, it ain't Yuka. Friggin' Giga.
Elena Goldsmith
Anime: Variable Geo
All things considered, it may have actually been Elena who first caught my eye in the magazine review that arguably ruined my life. You do NOT combine bunnysuits with the biggest boobs I'd ever seen, then combine THAT with puberty, and expect good results. Bunnygirls are hot.
Kaori Yanase
Anime: Variable Geo
Yet another lie anime has perpetuated: Nerds are hot. ...okay, they CAN be cute in real life, but we're gonna just knock two digits off of the 100% success rate anime has... You can adjust the remaining digit to whatever non-zero you like.
Anime:
Eiken
It's kind of like a big breast hentai, only there's no hentai. When I saw this for the first time back before the 2000s went south (I believe that happened starting in 2000), I'm not sure my groin understood the difference. Don't fret, those with ass, loli, and confusing loli fetishes: in this order, Komon-no-sensei, Kyoko (not galleried, twit), Komoe.
Video Game:
Pachinko Sexy Reaction
The Sammy Corporation realized that the fact you can't win actual money from arcade gambling games sucks. They called in Kotoyoshi Yumisuke to provide what they call "alternative prizes", and what the rest of us (and probably Kotoyoshi Yumisuke himself) call "really big boobs". Arcade goers saw it as a fair shake.
Satsuki Kaoru
Anime: Amazing Nurse Nanako
Sure, the anime has that nice little round-peg-in-square-hole, "almost-never-works" combo of silly characters in serious plot, and it's admittedly fairly marginal when it concentrates on the latter, and I would be thrilled to see someone hit Ogami in the head with a big heavy stick. Nevertheless, the main girl characters, Satsuki and Nanako, are still cute. And nobody will ever gallery Satsuki if I don't.
Dr. Marilyn
Hentai: Marine A-Go-Go
One of the VERY few hentais that has humor as a focus and actually IS, y'know, FUNNY. It's also yet another notch on the belt of the ol' "Bad Guy Is Way Outright Hotter Than The Good Guy" cliche that 99% of anime follows to the bloody hilt. So far I've only bothered to do episode three despite owning the DVD four years later. Bunnygirls are hot.
Natsune Tachibana / "Judo Laker"
Anime/Game: "Battle Team Lakers EX"
What I like to call "Sentai Chicks Gone Wild" is a series that's a three-game affair back in Japan. The fact that the games are over 15 years old bodes ill for a stateside release. It's also a one-episode anime where Natsune inexplicably gets a tan. Did I mention that Natsune has the biggest boobs by FAR, so she gets the gallery? Yuka Takeuchi Fan, bringin' ya the HONEST side of rampant chauvanism.
Anime:
Usagi-chan De Cue!
A fun little comedy involving a literal bunnygirl who's as dumb as a hammer, by the creator of Iketeru Futari. She's blonde, so get the jokes out of your system at your leisure. I suspect that the reason this show has not seen American release is because anime companies don't want to deal with animal rights groups. See, Mimika's rabbit brain is clearly a few IQ points downhill of humans, and I'm sure they wouldn't like that. Bunnygirls are hot. So are catgirls. But not as much so as bunnygirls.
Mizuki Tachibana
Anime: Gravion (Zwei)
Masami Obari, we salute you. In case you've forgotten by this point that girls, indeed, possess asses, Mizuki will remind you of this in a pilot suit that in no way, shape or form could ever have been designed by a woman. Don't worry, though, ALL of her outfits also reveal a pair that would suffocate a man in the sexiest way. Also, if Mizuki is a good benchmark of how women act while drunk, I'm carrying as bottles of Jack Daniels in my Haruko bag as can conceivably fit inside for the remainder of my life. Only one shall remain sober.
Hentai:
Bakunyuu Oyako
This series has an American name, but I refuse to say it here, it is so inhumanly stupid.
Because the creators of the "Milk Junkies" series apparently pal around with the guys who named the movies in the "Alien" series, this is actually based on the first game in the series. The CG pack probably has better animation, if you need a clue as to whether or not I recommend the anime, stupid American name aside. The still shots are nice, though. Cheatin' mother count: 1.
Hentai:
Slight Fever Syndrome
More notable for being the first hentai I ever saw on DVD than for being incredibly busty, but I still liked the show and there's that whole "nostalgia" thing. Art's still cute. Special Bonus Features: Stupid Dub Tricks and The Many Funny Faces of Miss Mizuki.
Hentai:
Nami SOS
English: "Sexy Sailor Soldiers"
Fun facts. It's based on a manga we'll never see stateside that I don't cover here that lasts WAY longer than the anime's ONE episode. Its changed English name is actually NOT that stupid and really does fit the anime, dare I say, pretty well. Did I mention it only lasts one episode? I mean, what the HELL?
Hentai:
G-cup Teacher Rei
Do not attempt to watch this anime, do not attempt to watch this anime, do not attempt to watch this anime. Did I say it enough times for it to sink in, or is your stupid ass going to just watch it anyway to prove a nonexistent point? Dumbass.
Yes, the animation sucks on a level that's so severe that I have no suitable mean-spirited joke. Yes, it's gotten me into more trouble than any other animation I've ever asked questions about. Yes, it's the entire reason I don't post pictures ANYWHERE that isn't called "Bakunyuu Baka", "DeviantArt", or... this site.
Still, Rei's cute. So here you go. You owe me.
Mitsuka Yoshimine
Anime/manga/V.G.: DearS
Technically, she's in the manga. I'm not covering the manga. I guess she's in a video game too, which I'm also not covering. One of the thousands of regrets I have about my life was that none of my teachers were as insane, horny, and busty as Mitsuka.
Preferably one of my post-puberty teachers.
But I wouldn't have complained if it were pre-puberty.
Hentai:
Milk Junkies
English: "Boobalicious" (WHY does it start on episode THREE?!)
Remember my chat about "Bakunyuu Oyako"; it's up a few blocks? This is actually the anime counterpart to "Milk Junkies 2". If I squint really hard, I've found I look like Wataru, which immediately makes this the best hentai EVER. It's also one of the VERY few I've ever seen that passes two episodes (FOUR episodes), and adds a third girl that's not in the games for the third episode on up. I suppose it's academic 'cause my lazy ass hasn't went past the first.
Hentai:
Equation of the Immoral
English: Immorality
Wow, one of the elite few name changes we've ever seen to ANY anime-based media that doesn't simply miss the damned point. Regardless, in the zero chance that for some reason, a dimensional rift opens and anime girls walk the earth, avoid Sayoko. I can only describe "why" as what amounts to the mother of all STDs that results in death for Not Sayoko.
Rushuna Tendo
Anime/manga: Grenadier
Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4
While, as always, my lazy ass can't be bothered to scan the manga, which is widely available and should be bought by you anyway, it should be known that the manga is actually SIGNIFICANTLY different than the anime and deserves a look for that reason alone. Getting back to the point, girls with guns are awesome. And get this: her breasts are actually used for something besides gallery fodder! All I can say is "screw ammo pouches".
Mikan Kurenai
Anime: Grenadier (during ep. 9)
Mikan's a balloon master (don't ask). Mikan knows how to do some crazy things with balloons. Bunnygirls are hot.
Setsuna Oomido
Anime: Grenadier (ep. 12)
Has a MUCH larger role in the manga from what I can tell. Does not visibly bounce all over the place in the manga. Knows every trick in the book that Rushuna knows, and does it with the added benefit of looking totally badass. Must be the hair.
Anime: Mouse
Mei Yayoi Hazuki Group shots Animations
Supposedly, it's also a manga. I've never seen it. Ol' Sorata must be the luckiest bastard in the world (trust me- watch the girls in ACTION), but since the anime is not rated for mass hentai action, it's mostly a "look but difficult to touch" endeavor. Caution: May confuse feminists due to a combination of women who actually know what they're doing and the same women being sluts.
Anime: Jungle de Ikou
Mii, page 1 Mii, page 2 Rongo Groups, others Animations
An oldie but a goodie. I don't think more need be said about Mii than "Flower spirit whose breasts symbolize maternal power". And here you thought 'symbolism' was just something that made you fail English classes! I'm also 100% convinced I'll be the only person ever to throw down with a gallery specifically dedicated to Rongo.
Mina Hayase
Hentai: Sexfriend
Also: Taeko
Despite the name that ensures you know this is a hentai without even looking at the box, it's actually a surprisingly tame show (none of that freaky shit or questionable concepts that most hentai's known for nowadays), and dare I say it? Cute. Surprisingly, the dub does not suck. Features the obligatory Nurse's Office. Complete with Nurse!
Anime: Cyberteam in Akihabara
Before anything else: This gallery is largely incomplete and MY but it needs some retooling before anything makes the damndest bit of sense. Sure, it's cliche-ridden, but the bad guys are nonetheless sexy idiots whose personalities are a riot to watch bounce off each other, and it's fun to see that, apparently, all five major good guys grow up to look fairly similar, a lot less chatty, and with much bigger boobs.
Anime: Burn-up W, Burn-up X
Before anything else: This gallery is ALSO largely incomplete, only has the gallery data for W, and is ALSO a mishmashed center of nonsense. Burn-up in general is interesting in that only W and X have ANYTHING to do with each other. It also has the bustiest police officers (Lilica notwithstanding) this side of a bad porn movie. The future is awesome.
Anime: Divergence Eve, Misaki Chronicle
Once again, gallery is mostly incomplete and insane and I'm not even in the general vicinity of Misaki Chronicle yet. A sci-fi series that everyone really hates solely because the girls have breasts that aren't as flat as my hand. Did I mention that anime reviewers as a collective need a foot up the ass? It's actually a pretty damn interesting show, I thought anyway. Dare I say the fanservice is a back seat to the plot? Or did I just blow your damn mind?
Komachi
Anime: Nurse Witch Komugi (ep. 5)
To tell you the truth, the anime she's from really kinda sucks. It's a long story, but suffice to say it's really only watchable when Komugi and Koyori (see: Later gallery) are attempting to kick each others' asses, which doesn't happen often long enough and usually doesn't last very long. Nevertheless, Komachi shows up in the final episode to turn the bust factor up to 11 (Koyori turned it up to 7 beforehand). Don't bother trying to track anything but the surname.
Big Boing
Anime: Konjiki no Gash Bell
Yes. It's @$%#ING "ZATCH @$%#ING BELL".
Although I could say something about the character herself, I could not make this combination of anime and character up under ANY circumstance. Big Boing is a character bred for pure fanservice that, although her appearance is not common, resides in an anime that is meant for the prepubescent. Aside from her grin creeping me the hell out, she may well be the ultimate fanservice character. The "why" is inside. Will be known as "Lady Susan" in the inevitably butchered American release because parents are idiots.
Khi
Anime/Manga: DearS
This gallery is part of an evil joke I pulled during my version of an April Fools' update, but eh... There MAY be female readers of this site; I know not WHY, so this remains for them.

Khi is a young male DearS that works more or less as a diplomat to the DearS colony. A "sheep", as they call him. As is DearS protocol, he is dressed in what basically amounts to bondage gear.



FEATURES
FEATURE
DESCRIPTION
"A New Rival"
Y.T.F.-exclusive doujin
A gift project on which I collaborated. It's a new Variable Geo tournament, and another big battle between Yuka and Elena's about to start. (There be nipples in this gift, so unless you're an idiot, don't read this at work. If you ARE an idiot, shoot yourself in the head. Candy will pour out of the holes.)



RECURRING RAMBLINGS
FEATURE
DESCRIPTION
Yuka Takeuchi Fan's Halfhearted Game Reviews
I review the hits. If by "hits" you really mean "games that are either too strange to be for real, follow no rules of logic whatsoever, or should never be played with human hands". Take heart though. Some of the weird ones are pretty cool.
Ask the Yuka Takeuchi Fan
It doesn't mean you'll like the answer. Plus there's a good chance I'll hunt you down and light you on fire if you ever ask me anything about Milk Junkies.
Random Musings
I prove that I should really just occupy my brain with getting "Saint" in Dead Rising for the fiftieth time rather than attempt to let my mind wander. Normally that leads to my mind getting summarily mugged.
Rejected Banner Designs
Although the banner has largely went the way of the dodo, and in its place are rampant 10GB Flash interstitials that routinely infect computers with malware, I prove that the simple JPG banner is still kickin'.

Some of those instances of proof sucked, though.



OTHER THINGS I RUN AND/OR DO
Bakunyuu Baka!
Message Board
Finally, not only do I have the board back, it's actually again on a server that directly relates to my site. Since I'm a paranoid asshole that hates seeing conflict, and I'm the moderator, good news for you!

For the second time in your lives, enjoy.
Y.T.F. Draws
A DeviantArt account I set up and slug the stuff I draw up on to. As you might expect given how I am about the site, I update it extremely rarely and I'm not good at what I do.




LINKS
It's possible that you may wish to buy many of the items you see on my site. That's a good thing! See, what you're doing is convincing people to create MORE STUFF for our fanservice-fueled, game-junkie selves. Here, let me help you out with your buying habits a little.
I'm a gamer, you know this. Give some online games I frequent a try. There may not be MANY, but why not take a crack? Maybe we can be like bestest pals or something. Don't ask me to give you things, lazy-ass noob.
Some out there see fit to link to my site. Some even alert me to this. Thus, some are noted for doing so. Here is where.
I look at a lot of things. I'm too much of a lazy gas-bag to bother listing them ALL down, but some of the highlights of my life's internet surfing can be found here.




WANNA LINK TO ME?

Looks like SOMEONE'S looking for link list padding!

Well, assuming you know some basic HTML tricks (you can go to HTML Goodies if you don't know said tricks), just save one of the below pictures and use that as a linking image, or, if you are a lazy little son-of-a-somebody like myself, use text links, like I do.






Slap between an "A HREF" tag set and be happy.



CONTACTUAL AGREEMENTS: WANNA TALK TO THE YUKA TAKEUCHI FAN?

I can be reached at " yukatakeuchifan (Shift-2, or 'at') gmail (period) com ". If you cannot decipher that or are too lazy to type it into an e-mail device yourself, the odds are high that I wouldn't want to talk to you in the first place.

Don't expect a quick response; I'm quite bad about it these days.

You might also be interested in this fact- I'm on AOL Messenger a lot- with the predictable user name YukaTakeuchiFan. You can also find me on MSN Messenger on much rarer occasions.

Useful information is always appreciated, readers.




(Yeah, I wanna know how much traffic this site gets. Can you blame me?)